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Shane Cartledge @WritersBlock

Age 33, Male

Curtin Uni

Perth, Australia

Joined on 1/8/07

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WritersBlock does live performance!

Posted by WritersBlock - August 21st, 2008


Ok, as you may or may not know, I've been talking about this performance I had coming up. It was tonight. And it went really well.
I'll say a bit more than that though.
A couple of months ago, I filled out the official forms to participate in my town's local annual Music Festival. The piece; Prologue
For the previous 7 years, I've performed and watched others perform in the festival. I've done guitar solos, piano solos, a guitar duet, a guitar trio, guitar ensemble, modern guitar solo, piano concerto and choir. This was the first time I have performed an original composition. A piano solo.
Out of my 8 years competing in this festival, I've had ups and downs. I've felt the euphoria of succesfully completing my pieces, and the self-disappointment in feeble attempts, and one time I could only perform one of my two submitted pieces. I was late to start learning the piano, age 10, when others had been learning from 5 or 6. So there I was, a good couple of feet taller than the younger, more disciplined girls that I was up against. I should point out now that the festival is split up into sections, such as grade restricted piano solos and age restricted solos for other instruments, and then marked and critiqued by an adjudicator.
The adjudicator changes from year to year, although they're always the well learned and highly skilled and experienced musicians. Sometimes they judge hard, sometimes they judge soft, sometimes they comment negatively, sometimes positive, it's a real russian roulette to see if you're going to suffer at the hand of a merciless judge. So, year after year, I'd walk out onto the stage, light shining brlightly on me, and out there is about 300 seats, with probably 100 filled with parents hoping that their child doesn't forget their dynamics or that they stick to the tempo. I'll say now, as a 10 year old kid with about8 months experience on the piano, and about 5 months on guitar, going out onto a bright stage, and looking at all the anticipating parents, and the adjudicator, pen at the ready, it's no wonder some kids succumb to tears, and it's certainly no surprise to feel terrible nerves. For the first couple of years, I coped remarkably well. A few years into it and I was coping much better than others, but unpreparedness caught me unawares. While it was all fine and dandy to play my piece of 4 lines long and take away a glittery certificate, as I gained more experience, the music became more complicated, I needed to practice more... I needed to practice. I learned that public performance isn't always so easy. The music wasn't that hard, but even a little doubt and a whole lot of nerves can lead to a downward spiral of disappointment. But it's something you get over. When you think about it, there's hundreds of people performing, going through that same mental challenge, the nerves before a performance. No-one's going to judge you for stepping down or for fumbling a note, or, in one instance that I had, forgetting to open up your book and playing without the music only to realise what you had done once you finished. There's also the mature age entries, the people who started learning an instrument at age 45 rather than age 5. To them, it's not about going on into a bright and prosperous career in music, rather a personal goal, a yearning to learn the universal language of music and to share it with the community. Now for a lot of these people, it's a step out of the ordinary life, performing in this event, and so they get the nerves too. Age doesn't factor in one's ability to cope under pressure, although experience does help. A friend of mine performed tonight brilliantly in a lengthy cornet solo. It appears that he has all the confidence in the world. But for the amount of times he's been out on that stage, the nerves become just another part of performing.
I don't get nervous nearly as bad as I used to, now I don't really take these nerves as a bad thing. It lets me feel alive and vulnerable, like I'm gambling on the expectations of the audiences. Tonight I was a little more nervous than if I were just performing some song that some professional composer wrote, but this was all me, performing my own composition which only a few have heard me play before. So I was being judged on the composition as well as the performance.
Well, it's suffice to say that, as the only competitor in my section, I scored a first place (not always guaranteed, I'll let you know) with an 85/100 with a kind, but tough judge. The comments were all positive, and the audience enjoyed it too. My mum cried. My grandparents cried, and my father was rather proud of me. Friends and acquaintances gave congratulations, two of my past music teachers were backstage, and they were rather impressed. They had seen me attempt to tackle my last two years of music in high school, skipping grades in an attempt to reach the standard of piano performance required for university. I didn't do so bad in the end, but not enough to pull through. But that didn't disappoint me. Performing isn't my strong point, and I tried to bite off more I could chew attempting to reach a 6th/7th level grade starting from 1st grade 5 years earlier (first couple of years were preliminary grades only). So I've settled in with my strengths in composing, and I've come to enjoy the occasional performance, now that the pressure has eased off. I'm only doing it for myself, and I find comfort in the fact that my family supports me and is proud of me, and my friends and teachers enjoy hearing me make the music that I love making. My theory teacher came up to me after the performance and told me about a songwriting compotition he thought I should enter the piece into, so it's great to know that this teacher, who's taught me oh so many things, and watched me gain confidence and skill, only to decline in the last few years and pull up right before the finish line, he sees what I've done as a thing worth nurturing and building upon.

I apologies for not paragraphing this better, and I appreciate those who take the time to read this "personal journey" of sorts. I feel this is worth sharing, as I don't think I'm alone in these experiences, and others might posibly benefit from gaining some insight into my performing "career".

Thanks very much newgrounds.


Comments

whoo! I wouldn't be able to do something like that! I mean, I've marched through New York City playing my trumpet a couple of times, and at Nascar, and some other places, but I was just one out of 300+ people playing the same piece of music, I wouldn't have the nerve to play on my own, to be out there on my own, to have hundreds of people watching my every move

you got a video of it? can you show us? (please?)

...

so I was watching an old Mythbusters rerun yesterday that I had somehow missed the original broadcast of, and they made a 4-foot wide subwoofer powered by a diesel engine and it put out, like 190 Decibels (enough to shatter your internal organs) and they were testing to wee whether or not an overdone sound system could blow up a car and the sunroof blew out and then the speaker exploded

Sadly, I don't have a video of it.
I'm really hoping to take what I've learned here to start up a band when I move out of home, and learn to write some punk/rock tunes and experience the local band atmosphere there.

Yeah, I've seen that episode, I found it quite amusing, but the show really has gone downhill since then.

Never overload my computer with words again!
you are quite the jimmy hendrex/mozart
I shall name you jimmy mozart
or would you prefer a more masculine name?
Drunk SlamChest
Blast HardCheese
Flint Ironstag
Think McRunfast
Rib SteakFace
Dirk HardPec
<a href="http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=CCHgyEieSAQ">http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=CCHgyEi eSAQ</a>
watch near the end
you will find out what I mean :P

lolwut?
I'll stick with WritersBlock for the time being. ;D

tell you what
when I get better at music, I shall bring my banjo and make a no. 1 jam with you :P

lol k. I hope I'll have my guitar hero controller working as an instrument by then. Else it's keyboard/guitar for me.

I know!
you shall be called
Big Mclargehuge

I'll let you know when I find a good artist name.

also where may I purchase some of those rainbow shoe laces that you were speaking of in your last post when you were "polishing shoes"?

Oh, they were from my work as a little fundraiser promotion thing for organ donations of people under 16. We don't have any more left (bunnings, that is) so I don't know if they'd have any over your way.

ah well
that is ok
I would prefer bright green laces on my steel caps anyway :D
also tell me if i am seeing things right
<a href="http://www.2flashgames.com/f/f-Spermies-6310.htm">http://www.2flashgames.com/f/f-Spermi es-6310.htm</a>
who in their right mind think of making this!?

Women. They're sick-minded, I tell ya!

Good job! I've done live performances before as part of a band, but never on my own. Although, that might change - Quarl and I are talking about a potential show together down in Albany, New York.

Maybe you could join us, lol

I think it's a lot easier for me if you guys came to Albany, Western Australia. ;P
Solo performances are great. Once you're done, you're overwhelmed with accomplishment. The feedback I got was very encouraging, and it's getting me to reconsider my ideals that "music is just a hobby" and that maybe I should try and make a career out of it some day.
You and Quarl performing in New York? Sounds completely awesome. I can't begin to comprehend how I'd perform my material here on NG. Prologue is the only song that I think is possible for me to perform. I should seriously try and start up a band when I move to Perth, and write some awesome songs for us to play. Else I could somehow work out how to solo perform some kickass electronica. And then maybe I might join you guys.

how's the plot for world domination, oh, sorry, I mean, how's the music composition coming? is it hyper enough?

Oh, yeah, my underground slave factory and re-educating barracks are coming along well, and so far, no one knows wha-
Oh, uhm, the song... Yeah, I haven't done much with it. I've got a good break from work now, so I might get a bit done, I'm trying to remake Carbon Baby for the album at the moment as well, so it'll be a bit of a juggling act. Oh, and there's also my Madness audio competition submission that I need to finish.
Me and my "big plans".

Another wall of text :/
You sure like to typ

Yes. Yes I do.

Awesome job man!
How many people were there?

It's been some years since I performed live, on my own.
I was 8 when I started playing Keyboard(lol skills). But being in the center of attention used to be way too nervewrecking for me back then. I got a lot of attention from all the music teachers overthere, but I couldnt handle it all. They all considered me as "the musical talent" of the school(I still don't see why, it's just a bunch of premade loops controlled by chords). I was even offered a free year of music lessons, but I had a mental breakdown. I was 13 at that age.

I never really stopped music actually, I even improved a little. My music teacher was cool and thanks to him I had gotten my hands on Fruity Loops. I think I know more about music as a whole now than I could ever have if I stayed there. Though I don't consider my skills with keys as all that amazing, and I'm not very skilled at reading notes either. But I'm glad I went my own way, writing my own songs. I got offered a recordlabel when I was 16, but I decided to decline. Again because of nerves.
No I'm not very confident indeed D:

Last year I had my own band for the first time. It didn't last long but it was very cool. Finally got to show people my own tunes live, albeit made together with other people. Old journal about that here:
<a href="http://whirlguy.newgrounds.com/news/post/20147">http://whirlguy.newgrounds.com/news/p ost/20147</a>

Anyway, enough about my music past :P
Scoring first place is fucking awesome dude. Fucking awesome.
Too bad you didn't pull throuh though ):
But damn. Be proud of yourself! =D
And best of luck in your music future from mister Whirlguy! :3

Hey Whirlguy. Wow, you've had some musical past. I feel like we're on the same page here, my music teachers gave me so much. They didn't expose me to fruity loops though, my teachers were strictly classical, but I owe so much to them for getting me this far. Starting music at a young age can be tough, especially when people are asking so much of you. To get offered a year of free music lessons and a record label by age 16 is so damn awesome. I would say that if I had been in your shoes, I might have done the same.
Do you have a good music community where you live? I know whenever someone out of town comes here for the music festival they're always surprised at how strong the music community is here. My town has 15,000 people, and there's just a ton of kids that compete in the festival each year.

The decision not to sit the final exam for my music class was probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. I had to make the decision about half way through the year, I had to fill out a couple of forms, and physically handing those forms in was both a burden and a relief. The amount of practice I needed to do was way too much for me to handle, but I actually stayed in the class to the end of the year even though I wouldn't sit the exam, just because I loved the learning so damn much. After I pulled out, my grades in music improved, because that pressure had lifted and, like now, there's no strings attached, nothing to trip me up or get in the way of my goals because my goals are targeted in different fields.
I couldn't get into the universities for music because of the performance standards, but I just wanted to do composition, and the performance and practices would just hold me back from what I really wanted to do.
As of late, I've started to reconsider my future in the music industry. So many people have told me that it'd be a waste of talent if I just became a maths teacher and did nothing with my music. My music teacher, who watched me as I fell into... well I suppose it was a bit of depression, you could say, he thought that I might stand a chance entering in a national competition. People telling me I should write for films and people telling me that I have a real talent, that I'm not just some kid with a delusional dream, it really makes me wonder, what if? What if I can make it in the music industry, not as a chart topping pop singer, but as a composer for films or games, or something like that? What if I did nothing? To be told "kid, you'll go places someday", that, to me, it means that maybe I should have some aspirations for my music. Maybe being an editor or publisher or teacher isn't where I should end up.

Now, starting a band, I would love that, although I never really got too good at electric guitar. I'm a decent finger picker, but my electric guitar is so different to my classical, that converting from one to the other just doesn't work. I'd need a hollow-bodied left handed electric with a wide fret board for me to feel comfortable, otherwise, I'll either try and pick up a bass, use my keyboard, or on a whim, buy a violin or viola and learn to play and write for them.

I guess being on Newgrounds, I see a lot of real talented people that I don't really notice myself anymore. There haven't been too many people like me coming out of my town. I guess I'd be a more common "talent" in Perth or Sydney, or some other Australian city, but I mean, hanging around you guys, MaestroRage, Rig, SolusLunes, SBB, and oh so many more other musicians, it's damn awesome. I know all these great people, and if people think I'm outstanding, then these guys surely must be off the fucking chart.

I'll comment about your band on your blog.

And the no. of people watching me? Not huge. Let me think... the capacity was 400-500, I think. So I'd say about 150-200 people. I've also done a few group performances in Perth and Margaret River. I've just loved the passage I've taken in learning and performing, and meeting and befriending awesome people, there's just so many memories I'll never forget.
Oh, there was also the Musical, in which I was part of the band. Three nights in a row, we played some fun old fashioned musical tunes while the performers on stage sang about a man-eating plant. It was one of those things that was just so damn amazing, the people I worked with (mostly school kids), and the whole experience was just brilliant.

And best of luck to you, mister Whirlguy for your music future. If you've improved any amount from your past (which there's no doubt you would have), it looks like you're in the right direction too.

I was wondering who stole my blueprints for a Dalek army :P

madness eh? if you mean the cross-faced psychotic things then that means it'll definitely have to be metal, which is one of the genres you seem to shy away from, should be good

redoing carbon baby eh? sounds good

...

well, the Olympics are over, I heard the American and Chinese national anthems quite alot, didn't hear the Australian one though, I've been kinda wondering how it goes... *looks it up on youtube*

Yeah, that madness. I'm doing something kind of out of my norm, but not metal. Classical hip hop. (Well it sounds hip hop to me D:)
And I might try an drum n bass-ish thing.

Also, the Astralian diver won gold. The chinese got gold on all 7 other diving events.

And the Australian anthem is terrible. It's not even written by an Australian.

Music community? You mean online or real live? Sadly I don't know any music communities. Unless you mean music schools, yeah we have those. In fact, we live in the same street now where the owner of the musicschool I used to go to, lives. I don't think there's 15k of members there though O_o

I've been trying to play a bit of guitar myself hehe. I guess it's just way too hard for me though, with the chords and all. I wouldn't say I couldn't do it though, I just don't think I have the patience. I've been interested, just like you, to go try and play bass :P

And yeah there's loads of tallented people on Newgrounds. I've always considered myself rather outcast hehe.

Naw, real communities. Of the 3 days the music festival is on, there'd be a good100-200 people performing, including primary school choirs and such. There's about 4 or 5 piano teachers that I know of, as well as a couple of guitar teachers and a few that teach other instruments. There's plenty of students, and it's kind of like how it is here on NG, quite a lot of us know eachother. There's probably a good 70-75 music kids in high school, and a few have moved away since I've been here, and I'm still in contact with a few of them, and I guess they're all really easy to get along with.

Niiiice.
I haven't heard of anything like that in my town. Sometimes there's performances of bands, surely. But it's nothing as big as what you guys have in your town. Awesome..
I wish we had something like that.

The gig I had with my band was at a neighborhood party lol.

Yeah, it's quite lucky, my piano teacher lives right across the road. There's not much in terms of bands in my town, but I've heard a few big bands emerge from Perth (Pendulum lol, Birds of Tokyo, these guys are fuckin' awesome, and to a lesser extent, Fourth Floor Collapse, not too famous, but their soft rock style is really good.)

I think, growing up with lots of classical surroundings has been great, but it's not really much of a help for writing rock or punk songs. Yeah, I'd like to write some punk songs and be all like "anarchistic, yo!" Getting out of classical discussion here and into bands so I'll move it over to your band's blog again. :D